Maybelle Crabtree here. You know I always thought I had good self-control. I mean I don’t drink, smoke, overeat, spend too much money, or cheat. Sounds pretty good, right? But I found out I was mistaking willpower for self-control. They are, in fact, two different things.
For instance, willpower is derived from two Latin words which, together, means “to be able to wish or desire.” To put it another way, willpower is a desire to do something.
Self-control, on the other hand, is an Old English word which has two roots. One means to “rein in or curb,” and the other to “heal, preserve, make whole.” These roots apply to the sensitive nature of people: their minds. In other words, Self-controlled equals healthy-minded.
The Difference Between Willpower and Self-Control
So you see self-control is not willpower. It’s not something we get by gritting our teeth and forcing ourselves to “just say no.” Self-control is the ability to stop and think before making a choice. It evolves and takes time to acquire because it has to naturally develop. However, willpower is the ability to delay gratification and resist temptations or impulses. It is not a conscious choice and has temporary results.
For example, willpower will allow you to eat healthy and exercise to lose weight. But it is self-control that kicks in to maintain that weight loss. Most people fall back onto their ingrained habits without self-control.
Why You Need Self-Control?
Self-control, as a Fruit of the Spirit element, helps us resist temptation and avoid conforming to things of this world. It guides decisions and correlates with how to show the other Fruit elements in our lives. When we exercise self-control, we respond to situations instead of reacting to them. Responding is a thoughtful reasoning while reacting is emotional and which makes us more likely to become defensive and say hurtful things.
With self-control, we have an active effort to resist the temptation to go back to the ways of the world around us because we have been shown God’s spiritual way of life. In fact, we are told in 1 John 2:16 that, “For the world offers only a craving for physical pleasure, a craving for everything we see, and pride in our achievements and possessions. These are not from the Father, but are of this world.” (NLT) These physical pleasures, cravings and pride are Satan’s ideas for the world, not God’s.
Self-Control Ties the Elements Together
Lastly, self-control is the final Fruit element mentioned because it ties it all together. Eddie Foster on the website, lifehopeandtruth.com, says that when we have self-control, we:
- show true godly love instead of lust and infatuation;
- have godly joy when we’re facing a difficult situation in life;
- get along with others and make peace instead of constantly getting into conflicts;
- patiently bear with others rather than quickly condemning them;
- do not automatically look out for ourselves but kindly look out for other people;
- do good by going through the narrow gate toward life rather than the evil, wide gate of destruction;
- be faithful and not have that faith shattered by the mocking of scoffers; and
- become a gentle servant of the Lord, showing compassion and mercy with real love as God does with us.
To conclude, self-control needs to be exercised on a consistent basis. We gain a better ability to direct our lives in a manner that is persistent with our true selves when our self-control increases. We then feel better about ourselves and the decisions we make when our actions, thoughts, and feelings are harmonious. This, in turn, raises self-esteem and self-confidence. It, also, reinforces in our minds what we’re really capable of and makes it less difficult to make similar decisions in our lives in the future. And what could be better than that?
Give me your opinion in the comment section and let’s discuss.
Maybelle Crabtree signing off.